Some ways to effectively annoy your telemarketer.

Tip number one:

A polite telemarketer is going to start off by asking you how you doing but they don’t actually expect you to answer truthfully. They prefer that you just reply “fine thank you” but today you’re going to take them by surprise right from the beginning. You are going to reply honestly and say “You know what, I am so glad you asked. Nobody ever seems to care how I am doing and I have so many problems I would really love to discuss…”

Tip number two:

Once you come to the part where they state their name, ask them to spell it for you. Then ask them to spell the company name. Ask where are the company is geographically and then ask them to spell the street name.

Tip number three:

Pretend that you recognize the person who was calling and say “Peter, oh my God, it’s that you? How are you doing?? What have you been up to??”

Tip number four:

If you are asked to sign up for any kind of family plan, start sobbing and then say “I don’t have any family any more. Would you be my family?”

Tip number five:

Tell your telemarketer that it’s very convenient he/she called because you are serving a sentence at home with a tracking device on your leg and then ask if they can bring over some chips and soda.

Tip number six:

Tell the telemarketer that you are busy right now but they are welcome to leave their number for you so you can call them at home during dinner.

Tip number seven:

Once your telemarketer is done doing his or her marketing, take a deep breath and whisper “You know, that really turned me on.. is there any chance you would marry me?”

Tip number eight:

Ask your telemarketer to talk v-e-r-y s-l-o-w-l-y because you want to write down every word.

They will not bother you again.

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Tags: joke, silly

This entry was posted on Tuesday, November 24th, 2009 at 5:02 pm and is filed under joke. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.