Here are a few peeves that dogs have about humans … from the dog’s point of view.

1. Blaming your farts on me….not funny. Not funny at all!
2. Yelling at me for barking. I’m a freakin’ dog, you idiot. And if you want quiet, stop making noise yourself.
3. Taking me for a walk and not letting me check stuff out. Exactly whose walk is this anyway?
4. Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose. Just stop it!
5. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you’re not home.
6. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! Whoooo Hoooo, what a proud moment for the top of the food chain.
7. Taking me to the vet for “the big snip”, then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back! Now really, can you blame me?
8. Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I haven’t quite mastered that handshake thing yet.
9. Dog sweaters. Hello? Haven’t you noticed the fur? Don’t be ridiculous.
10. How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth. You’re just jealous. Admit it.

Now lay off me on some of these things, We both know who’s boss here! You don’t see me picking up your poop do you?

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Tags: dogs, joke, pets, silly

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