Microsoft Light Bulb Jokes
Posted by: JesterQ. How many Bill Gateses does it take to change a light bulb?
A. One. He puts the bulb in and lets the world revolve around him.
Q. How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?
A. We can see no need for uninstallation and have therefore made no provision for light bulbs to be removed.
Q. How many Microsoft support staff does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Four. One to ask “What is the registration number of the light bulb?”, one to ask “Have you tried rebooting it?”, another to ask “Have you tried reinstalling it?” and the last one to say “It must be your hardware because the light bulb in our office works fine…”
Q. How many Microsoft vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Eight: one to work the bulb and seven to make sure Microsoft gets $2 for every light bulb ever changed anywhere in the world.
Q. How many Microsoft managers does it take to change a light bulb?
A. We’ve formed a task force to study the problem of why light bulbs burn out, and figure out what, exactly, we as supervisors can do to make the bulbs work smarter, not harder.
Q. How many Windows programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
A. 472. One to write WinGetLightBulbHandle, one to write WinQueryStatusLightBulb, one to write WinGetLightSwitchHandle…
Q. How many Microsoft MIS guys does it take to change a light bulb?
A. MIS has received your request concerning your hardware problem, and has assigned your request Service Number 39712. Please use this number for any future reference to this light bulb issue. As soon as a technician becomes available, you will be contacted.
Q: How many Microsoft Word support technicians does it take to change a light bulb?
A. We have an exact copy of the light bulb here, and it seems to be working fine. Can you tell me what kind of system you have? Ok. Now, exactly how dark is it? Ok, there could be four or five things wrong . . . have you tried the light switch?
Q. How many Microsoft technicians does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Three: two holding the ladder and one to screw the bulb into a faucet.
Q. How many Microsoft testers does it take to change a light bulb?
A. We just document that the room is dark; we don’t actually fix the problems.
Q. How many C++ programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
A. You’re still thinking procedurally. A properly designed light bulb object would inherit a change method from a generic light bulb class, so all you’d have to do is send a light bulb change message.
Q. How many shipping dept. personnel does it take to change a light bulb?
A. We can change the bulb in 7-10 working days; if you call before 2pm and pay an extra $15 we can get the bulb changed overnight.
Q. How many Windows users does it take to change a lightbulb?
A. One, but she/he’ll swear up and down that it was JUST as easy for him as it would be for a Macintosh user.
