A handful of 7 year old children were asked, what they thought of beer. Some interesting responses, but the last one is especially touching.

Tim: “I think beer must be good. My dad says the more beer he drinks the prettier my mom gets.”

Melanie: “Beer makes my dad sleepy and we get to watch what we want On television when he is asleep, so beer is nice.”

Grady: “My Mom and Dad both like beer. My Mom gets funny when she drinks it and takes her top off at parties, but Dad doesn’t think this is very funny.”

Toby: “My Mom and Dad talk funny when they drink beer and the more they drink the more they give kisses to each other, which is a good thing.”

Sarah: “My Dad gets funny on beer. He is funny. He also wets his pants sometimes, so he shouldn’t have too much.”

Lilly: “My Dad loves beer. The more he drinks, the better he dances. One time he danced right into the pool.”

Ethan: “I don’t like beer very much. Every time Dad drinks it, he burns the sausages on the barbecue and they taste disgusting.”

Shirley: “I give Dad’s beer to the dog and he goes to sleep.”

Jack: “My Mom drinks beer and she says silly things and picks on my father. Whenever she drinks beer she yells at Dad and tells him to go bury his bone down the street again, but that doesn’t make any sense.”

Three old guys are out walking on afternoon around their retirement home.

One man says to the second, “Windy, isn’t it?”

The second one says, “No, it’s Thursday!”

And the third one says, “So am I. Let’s go get a beer.”

One night at Cheers, Cliff Clavin explained the “Buffalo Theory” to his buddy Norm:

“Well ya see, Norm, it’s like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.

“In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first.

“In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine! That’s why you always feel smarter after a few beers.”