Bad Fathers

One day three young boys were playing, and talking about their home life with their parents.

One little boy said, “It’s about time I be getting home, because if I’m late for supper, my Paw will get mad and whip up on me. He’s a real mean Paw.”

The second little boy said, “Your Paw ain’t mean, I got the meanest Paw in the world.” The first little boy said, “How come you say that?”

The second little boy said, “Every time I go home, he slaps me if I say something, and if I don’t say something he slaps me. Man I just don’t know what to do anymore.”

The third little boy said, “Not me, I got the best Paw in the world. He plays with me, and does things with me. He’s a real good Paw.”

The first two boys looked at him kind of funny and said, “Do he teach you how to do things too?”

The third boy said, “He sho’ do, he’s teaching me how to swim! Every morning he takes me out to the middle of the lake, and let’s me swim back to the shore.”

The first two said, almost in unison, “Ain’t it kind of hard to swim from the middle of the lake back to the shore?”

“Naw, man, that’s the easy part, the hard part is getting out of that sack.”

Man Buying a Bra

bra

A man went to a lingerie shop and asked for a bra. The nice young saleswoman asked him "What size, sir?" "I’m sorry, I don’t know what the size is." The man said. "Please show me a big cup bra." The salesgirl thought about it and brought … [Continue reading]

Technology Breakthrough

apple computer

Apple Computer reported today that it has developed computer chips that can be implanted and play music inside women's breasts. The music is in stereo, of course. This is considered to be a major breakthrough because women are always complaining … [Continue reading]

A Few Simple Rules for Happy Living

happy living

Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold the vegetables while you chop. Avoid arguments with women about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink. For high blood pressure sufferers - simply cut yourself … [Continue reading]

Appeal of Games

computer games

Many people know that the majority of computer programmers also enjoy computer games. What they don't know is why games can be so appealing to those that already spend a great deal of time on the computer. The element that explains the appeal of … [Continue reading]

Quasimoto

quasimoto

Quasimodo goes to a doctor for his annual checkup. "I think something is wrong with your back," the doctor says. "What makes you say that?" Quasimodo asks. "I don't know," the doctor replies. "It's just a hunch." … [Continue reading]

Stripclub Birthday Surprise

A wife decides to take her husband to a strip club for his birthday. They arrive at the club and the doorman says, "Hey, John! How ya doin'?" His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before. "Oh, no," says John. "He's on my … [Continue reading]